True independence has to do with submission. No one, including me likes that word. Freedom though,
comes when I give up some of my will.
Freedom comes when I stop insisting on my way. Instead of forcefully stating my
own rights, I forfeit them. Do I do this? No, but I’m wishing that I could
because I’m realizing that maybe I don’t
have a right to be always understood. Maybe
I don’t have a right to have every
need met immediately. Maybe I don’t have a right to be heard first,
loudest, or every time. Could I actually
decide to let go of some of my rights?
I am learning that favor comes from God. And rights are linked to favor. When I exert my rights over others and over
God, I don’t usually sense that favor anymore. When I voice my own priorities
without thought to the effects of my words, I may be dismissing the needs of
others. The plans and desires that God has chosen for me become weak and
undecipherable. I can’t hear clearly anymore. When I choose to stay offended and
resentful because of a disagreement, then I may be missing an opportunity to achieve
peace. I miss the opportunity to grow in humility.
Giving is important. Submission is a form of giving. From
that, I end up receiving. By letting
others be first, I learn empathy. By letting
their ideas be important, we may both gain insight. By allowing them to be
heard, both of us may be validated as a human being. Even if I am right and another person is clearly
wrong, it is always best to listen and to respond slowly, to choose my words
thoughtfully. I must ask myself, Is this a
situation that merits being immediately heard or is this a time to wait? Even when it is time to stand up for what is
true and good, it is most important to demonstrate
kindness. What do I hope to gain? My own rightness? In others words, whatever I do,
do it in a loving manner. That may have eternal gain about which I know little .
The alcoholic me
was and still is selfish, even though sober.
The recovering me is free to think
of others. I must learn to wait and pray. By that I will get the direction that
I need. “Good Orderly Direction” comes with God’s peace and favor. It also comes with joy and liberty.
Submission is about checking my motives and yielding my impulsive
emotions. Submission includes showing honor, kindness, and respect to people
for the good of all people.
