Life has never felt like an easy road. I have had to do lots
of kinds of "work" to get healthy; climbing, sorting, healing,wrestling, and rebooting. There were several
years that felt pretty smooth. I had lots of choices, lots of fun, and lots of
good times. Though that is true still, I realize that life is not really my
own. If I am fully in recovery, I am always hoping for opportunities to help others
who may not yet have achieved sobriety. People were kind to me, how could I not repay
the kindness? That means that I don’t always get to complete my own plans. I
might be planning to go shopping and get called to a meeting. If I am a
follower of Christ that is also how life happens; I am hopefully led by compassion and a drive
to fulfill Christ’s goals. My own plans may have to go by the wayside for a day
or even be put on hold. Showing mercy
has lots of faces. That might include cleaning, driving, praying, talking, eating,
sitting by someone you don’t want to sit by... My own desires can’t be first. I am slowly
learning to ask God or at least listen to his voice when making plans so that I
don’t have to later say. Oh, sorry, I
have something else to do today.
When we help bear the
load, we are always on call. We are always sharing ourselves. We are always
listening. These things are not easy for me, and I often fail. But it’s always
good, VERY good, because we are in God’s army.
