Shame-filled glasses

 I have always looked at myself through shame-filled glasses. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t see myself as shameful. I was a shameful child. I did shameful things. I grew up to be a shameful adult who married a shameful man and had shameful children. Oh. And my parents were also shameful – and their parents. I did shameful things because I was already shameful at the core. I became a shameful alcoholic. I treated my family shamefully. I acted more and more shameful as the alcoholism progressed. Who will free me from this bondage of shame? Thank God, it has already been done by Christ Jesus my Lord! (Romans 7)

So now that I know I have been freed, it is time to take off the shame-filled glasses.  The thing is, I don’t even know how to live without the shame. I don’t know how to behave, or how to feel, or how to believe. I have to learn to trust God and people to help me.  I have to intentionally look through grateful and faith-filled eyes. It is a choice, and it is work. I believe it will be life-changing.